Damn Those Birds

27 04 2007

Cross posted from StikNstein…has no mercy

With apologies to Snowalker
Excerpted from an email to Protect Our Borders Now
Illustrations by StikNstein

I LOVE BIRDS

I bought a bird feeder.
I hung it on my back porch and filled it with seed.
P51811691.jpg

Within a week we had hundreds of birds taking advantage of the continuous
flow of free and easily accessible food.

But then the birds started building nests in the boards of the patio, above
the table, and next to the barbecue. Then came the poop. It was everywhere:
on the patio tile, the chairs, the table…everywhere.
05_bird_attack.jpg

Then some of the birds turned mean: They would dive bomb me and try to peck me even though I had fed them out of my own pocket.
bird.jpg

And others birds were boisterous and
loud: They sat on the feeder and squawked and screamed at all hours of the
day and night and demanded that I fill it when it got low on food.
IMG_0069.jpg

After a while, I couldn’t even sit on my own back porch anymore.
when_birds_attack_2.jpg

*****************************
SO…………
MON: I called our Animal Control Department and requested help to prevent the birds from coming in and was told, while there were laws protecting me from bird infestations, they didn’t have the time or manpower to enforce these laws, and that I was on my own.

TUES: So I took down the bird feeder and the birds were gone.
I cleaned up their mess and took down the many nests they had built all over the patio.
Soon, the back yard was like it used to be…quiet, serene and no one demanding
their rights to a free meal.

WED: The next afternoon there was a knock at my door……It was the local Audubon Society wanting to know why I took down my bird feeder. When I explained, they called me a cruel and racist bird hater. I said I loved birds, and that the farmers should be putting up bird feeders. I was informed the farmers only needed them for pollination….Local animal ordinances require that I must provide the feed and care for them.

THUR:The next day, some local farmers approached me at the bank and said the birds I had attracted were necessary to pollinate their crops and They would go bankrupt without them. They served me with an injunction requiring me to continue to feed them. (I think they are in cahoots with those Audubon folks.)

FRI:My daughter was arrested today by the justice department and charged with violating the civil rights of some birds she was trying to shoosh out of the yard so she could hang the laundry. It appears she injured one with a broom. With luck she should get out in 10-12 years with good behavior…….

SAT: Today PETA and the ACLU (Animal Civil Liberties Union) filed 14 lawsuits against me and my family claiming my actions were a violation of federal law….that only The Animal Control Department had the authority to protect my property from a bird invasion….My legal fees are mounting.

SUN: I HATE BIRDS!
*************************************
Now lets see…our government gives out free food, subsidized housing, free
medical care, free education and allows anyone born here to be a automatic
citizen. Then the illegals came by the tens of thousands. Suddenly our
taxes went up to pay for free services; small apartments are housing 5 families:
you have to wait 6 hours to be seen by an emergency room doctor: your
child’s 2nd grade class is behind other schools because over half the class doesn’t
speak English: Corn Flakes now come in a bilingual box; I have to press
“one” to hear my bank talk to me in English, and people waving flags other
than “Old Glory” are squawking and screaming in the streets, demanding more
rights and free liberties.

Maybe it’s time for the government to take down the bird feeder.

In Liberty
the snowwalker

I GUESS I’LL FIGURE SOMETHING OUT…………….
catt.jpg

A FEW OTHERS THINKING ABOUT GETTING A CAT:
Illegal Aliens Must Go….Will cheap fruit trump the rule of law?
The Peoples Patriot….The Bastardization of Our Identities.
Georgia Crime Watch……..But Illegal Immigrants are Just Here to Work!
The Undocumented Blogger….What’s the Matter with California?: How Liberals Won the Hearts of Criminals.

This was a production of The Coalition Against Illegal Immigration
(CAII).

If you would like to participate, please go to the above link to learn more. Afterwards, email the coalition and let us know at what level you would like to participate.

My Country-My View trackbacked with Those Dam Birds…
CommonSenseAmerica – Illegal Immigration, America, Freedom, News and Opinion » Damn Those Birds pinged this post.

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